When did staying motivated get so hard? One (major) thing stressed me out this week (on Monday) and I accomplished nothing. Aside from finishing American Horror Story: Asylum and learning how to play LoL with the boyfriend. I spent the entire week procrastinating and now it’s Sunday night and I started trying to do some last minute work and now I’m pretty sure I’ve talked myself out of doing most of it and telling myself I’ll do better next week. I’l relax tonight, go to bed at a decent time, and tomorrow I’ll start doing real work - on time and everything. I’m going to fail my classes if I don’t. I find creative ways of labeling things I need to do as irrelevant so I don’t feel bad for not doing them but this is getting serious. Also, ridiculous. Seriously ridiculous, dude. If I stay up late tonight working it’ll be a bad start to the week tomorrow, though. I’ve been saying this all fucking quarter but here it goes again - this week will be different. I’ll actually do some damn work.
I used to take pride in how skilled I’d become at procrastinating. Now that I actually have things to do it’s just a pain in the ass. I’m trying to break a million bad habits at once and my awesome procrastination skills combined with a total lack of self control are making it extremely difficult. To make things better, I now feel guilty for days like today. I set out to 1) Get Up On Time 2) Not Sleep After Work 3) Do Some Fucking Homework 4) Go to the Y and Get a New Card and 5) Go To Bed On Time. I managed to do these things: read and internet and disappoint myself. I’m setting practically the same standards for tomorrow but I’ll have less time - plans with the boyfriend in the evening. Also, the test I’m studying for is Thursday morning and I haven’t done any homework for my other classes yet this week. Eesh. Here’s to being accountable for the inordinate amount of time I waste.